Cannot keep silent any more

Dear James, Daniel and Emily,

Back in November, shortly after Manny's Cardiac Arrest, I was asked by a member of the family to tone down/limit what I said about members of the family. And I have tried to do so. But I have reached the limit of my patience with Tammy, and rather than blow up at her in person I had to put all of this down in writing instead. And if it gets back to her and she complains oh well, it is nothing that people haven't already said to her.

For the past 2 months we have all done as much as we can to help Connie, Kim & I have not done as much as Dennis & Megan, but we have done as much as possible. Over that same period of time Tammy has moved into Connie's house, taken advantage of her, driven her car into the ground, lost her job, refused to discipline her kids, and generally made things worse for Connie instead of better.

Connie's house is a complete mess, and is starting to acquire the odor that I associated with Tammy's houses. Tammy's kids have been obnoxious, disrespectful and do nothing to help their grandma. Tammy has done nothing to find a new job, she just lays around on the couch all day, or borrows Connie's van and runs out her gas. She keeps wavering back and forth as far as getting back with her 'husband' or not. It has just become a colossal pain, and I know that everyone is at the end of their rope.

I know there is nothing I can do about it. I can't make her grow up. I can't force Connie to throw her and the kids out. But that is what she needs at this point, she needs to be forced to live completely on her own, rather than leeching off Connie. I know she watches the kids for us, and for that I always say thanks. And we watch hers from time to time when she asks. But that is going to stop real damn soon because last night Kim & I found that 4 of our movies were gone from our DVD library, and the only person who could have remove them was one of her kids. So now, in addition to hiding the nicer of the kids toys when they come over, we will have to start watching our stuff. And that is just unacceptable.

This is rhetorical, because I know I cannot do anything about this, it is up to Connie to really put her foot down. So while advice is accepted, I can't expect this note to be anything other than catharsis for me.